Bored And Worried

I feel bored during the day. There is nothing much to do here, less tasks plenty of time to think of going out but I can't. I am afraid the car is gonna blow up if I drive it somewhere. Last Sunday, the front hood was steaming and leaking with a lot of water. It worries me. I asked my husband why that was, he had no answer. So now I feel trapped... I so wanting to see the crowd, breathe fresh air or get away from the house for a while...

At night, I worry to death...because of my blogs... I've been blogging for almost 5 yrs. now and my blogs are part of me that is hard to let go. So please God, don't let my great fear happen. You know deep in my heart I wish that they will stay as long as I live!

Missing My Little Siblings!

I miss my little sister, Alex now. I haven't talked to her since I came back from my vacation in the Philippines four months ago. I chose not to call them for I don't want to hear complaints or problems from people who cannot find peace in their own home. The only person I'm in contact with is my little sister through chikka messenger. She cannot send me a message their instead she'd send her reply to me on Facebook from her phone. It isn't enough I know, I want to hear her voice including my little brother but I want to wait a little longer before calling them.

We used to chat every weekend but I had our internet in Cebu disconnected for personal reason. Chatting and having to see them on the webcam was so cool. If only Philippines and America were close, I could've sneaked out here and see them quick each time I want to see their faces, hear their voice and just being a big sister to my little siblings!

~~ My Thought Of The Day ~~

I am open to expressing my feelings to my husband. Personal or intimate thoughts I have, I can easily burst it out to him.

Amazing! After 5 years of being married to him I still find him attractive, the feelings are constant, never changing, never fading and getting stronger each passing day. The attraction I have for him is the same the very first day I laid my eyes on him in the airport of his first visit in Cebu..until this very moment I am writing this entry.

...and that is exactly what I told him last night just before we head to wonderland...and all he could do is bump me with his elbow... ah I don't know what he was thinkin' all I know is that I was very wide awake when I said all those things to him.... BOW! Drama ra dah!

I Wanna Go Home

This song "Home" by Michael Buble really catches my emotion right now. It's December the 1st and not long from now, it will be Christmas. The more I think of it coming, the more the lonelier I get. I wanna go home this Christmas ok?

I hate to think, hear, watch music and videos that has something to do with Christmas becauseeeeeee it just makes me sicker! Hohohoho I long to experience the Noche Buena and fireworks at midnight again for once in my life. Four years not being able to hear firecrackers is so deafening to me that I wanna go home right away, can you hear me? I wannaaaa go home!!!

The "Kilig" Feeling Is Still There

After being married to my husband for five years I can certainly say that "kilig" feeling I had for him when I first saw him on the internet is still there! Kilig is Filipino word that I can best describe as a kind of feeling a teenager feels when she caught her crush staring back at her and that glance of him soothes down to her bones! It's a feeling of excitement that is so hard to describe.

I was right when I said "I do" when he proposed to me for marriage for he is still the same man I met years back! Seeing his face everyday makes me utter "handsome" with matching pinching of his cheeks, that same description of my man has never changed from the moment I laid my eyes on him until the present time. Yeah call me pathetic for marrying the man who IS MY TYPE!

I am blessed for I have found and married the man I never thought existed in this world. He is more than what I've hoped for. God is good for giving me my husband who is beyond what I am looking for!

Nah, what am I talking here in the middle of the night? I may just be too exhausted but just want to speak up what's in my heart tonight lolz. Ciao gotta sleep now mana ko padayag ako gibati!

What A Torture

Today is nothing like a boring day for me. I couldn't think of anything to do so I indulge myself on browsing for perfumes, clothes, shoes and any kind of stuff that a woman wants. I've visited several online stores and wherever I go BIG signs of LABOR DAY WEEKEND SALE are everywhere right in the front page.

I so wanted to buy atleast one item that I really like but I'm thinking of my family in the Philippines. They're already low on money and I have some but it's just enough for my monthly allowance to them. I have no budget for anything right now, honestly. Sigh. If only I had a job so I can buy anything I want.

My blogging is still not doing good. For the past couple of months it has been soooooo really tough for me so all I could do right now is try to avoid looking at temptations that could ruin my budget.